Sometimes in life it's hard to forget what you do have by concentrating on the things you wish you had. If I wanted, I could spend the rest of my life wishing I had hair but realistically it's not going to happen and I would just be wasting my wishes.
What I've seen in life are a couple of key principles. The first one
is to be thankful. Now it may seem like there isn't much to be thankful
about when it comes to losing your hair. When I first lost my hair
through alopecia I told myself 'I'm never going to get married, I'm
never going to be happy or have a life of purpose.' But it's a lie. It's
a lie to think that you're not good enough. It's a lie to think that
you're not worthy.
The second principle, to smile through genuine happiness. You know,
someone said to me the other day 'how come you smile so much?' and I'm
like 'well it's a long story but it's very simple at the same time.' But
the truth is it's very hard to smile sometimes in life, especially
through the pain. There are things that happen to you that you don't
understand and sometimes you just don't know if you're going to get
through it. You go through storms in life but you have no idea how long
this storm is going to be around for.
It's scary to think how many people have issues and struggles.
Issues with home or work life, issues with themselves, with others and
just with life in general. It's scary how many people think they are
worth nothing. But God put you on this earth for a purpose. You might
not think you're perfect. Society might not think you're perfect. But to
God, you are more than perfect.
I have a personal relationship with Jesus and he has helped me
through my struggles and to become the person I am today. If you do not
share that faith, well I am just thankful that I can share mine with
I was born into a catholic family and have been brought up learning
about Jesus and his teachings through primary school, high school and my
local church. However, as a stubborn teenager I dipped in and out of my
faith and when I was told my alopecia was pretty much for life I became
angry at God for letting this happen to me and eventually turned away
from him altogether. I lived my teenage years without any faith and I
will admit these were the deepest, darkest days I have experienced in my
life so far. When depression takes over you it totally consumes your
thoughts and actions. I recognised the irrationality and the weakness
and I would be angry at myself for being so pathetic, but the new me had
the upper hand and each day was a vicious spiral of draining, emotional
downfall. I will never know how I managed to get through my GCSE's, A
Levels, singing and ballet exams, or how I went on with life in general
and made it to this point to tell the tale.
Getting a place to study paediatric nursing at Nottingham University which has the largest
university based Christian Union in the country was just the start of
re-finding my faith. I was 19 years old and away for the weekend in
Wales with the Christian Union when I sealed my faith in God. From then
was the start of my amazing spiritual journey.
After months of church hopping I have finally found settled at Grace
Church in Nottingham and am in the process of planning to give my life
to Jesus and be a fully fledged member of the church through baptism at
some point in 2013. I look back on the years without God actively in my
life and it is only now when I can talk about those dark days that I
realise that it really was the longest and loneliest time.
My new faith has been my central source of strength and confidence to
live my life without limits. Before my faith this time round my
realisation and acceptance of my alopecia and myself was a struggle.
Don't get me wrong, religion isn't some miracle cure; things are still
tough, I have my down days and living with alopecia is a huge emotional
battle. However, the difference is how I can call on God to guide me and
help me approach and manage these dark times. Through the love of my
family, friends and faith in God for the first time I can see life past
my adversity and realise my life is filled with joy, purpose and light for the